kinomatika:

I had this conversation with my husband earlier today and I’ll try to break it down with you.

Basically, this guy is all ‘oh but I want equality for EVERYONE!’ yet he is neglecting the fact that since currently there ISN’T equality for women and minorities, we’re going to make a big stink about it because we’re fucking allowed to, and he’s trying to make that seem like making a big stink is a bad thing.

What I told my husband is this: ’because if you believed that everyone should be equal, you’d believe that people who are currently NOT equal are entitled to be angry about that inequality.’

So when women and other minorities make big strides, that’s a thing to be praised and a thing to be looked upon with great excitement because women and other minorities ARE NOT equal, and when we do something that pushes us forward towards equality, that’s something that should be publicized so other people (men women and nonbinary genders alike) can see it and get motivated and see that change is necessary. 

Right now, the male sex has a lot of advantages over everyone else. They make more money, hold more positions of power in politics and media, and use the female sex as a commodity. Granted, males are used as a commodity as well, but not NEARLY even remotely as much as the female sex. 

If things were perfectly equal and we were all on the same even playing field and everything was completely even between everyone and nobody was being oppressed, that would be great. 

Unfortunately, when you have a (presumably) white, heterosexual, cisgendered man complaining about how not ALL men are bad and it’ isn’t fair to HIM that he has to care about feminism because he isn’t part of the problem, he actually is because he’s perpetuating that mindset. 

True, not all men are assholes. But a great deal of men are, and that’s who the TED talk was focusing on. 

Hope that clears it up.

Also my friend Kelly gave me her two cents:

[12:32:46 AM] kurumi: that guy’s whole spiel was basically “EVERYONE SHOULD BE EQUAL SO DON’T SEPARATE OUT WOMEN FROM MEN” and it’s pretty obvious from societal standards that the guys who say that? they’re not saying that men should be able to be feminine and all that shit

[12:33:07 AM] kurumi: they’re saying that women should just fit into the men’s standards instead of making the standards equal so everyone CAN fit in however they want

[12:33:58 AM] kurumi: they want the puzzle piece from the 100+ cat puzzle to fit into their 250+ dog puzzle, they don’t want to have to go and buy a new puzzle where all the pieces fit together

[12:34:28 AM] kurumi: i think idk i’m having trouble communicating my deepseated loathing for dudes who go “WHY CAN’T EVERYTHING BE EQUAL” when women start being “uppity”

and then my friend roach added her input as well:

[12:44:09 AM] roach: Also yeah I agree with all of this. And it’s absurd to suggest that talking about ways women SPECIFICALLY are victimised by men somehow MAKES them victims.

[12:44:40 AM] roach: Quite a lot of the problems keeping women victimised is the way everyone dismisses their pain and silences their anger.

[12:45:19 AM] roach: Bringing up the ways women and minorities ARE and CONTINUE to be disenfranchised for the comfort and benefit of men and majorities is THE BEST WAY to raise awareness of how this happens

[12:45:25 AM] roach: and work towards a world where it doesn’t.

[12:45:57 AM] roach: to do otherwise is like trying to cure someone’s disease by hitting them every time they say they have a disease

[12:46:03 AM] roach: then call them a big fucking whiner who was lying anyway

[12:46:30 AM] roach: when they finally get tired of getting hit while also being sick

[12:46:34 AM] roach: and say ‘okay fine I’m not sick’

[12:47:07 AM] roach: you can’t work towards a cure if you don’t let sick people tell you how they’re hurting.

(rebloggable by request)