depression

a mess

my depression has been really bad lately but it hasn’t even been manifesting as sadness which I feel like would be easier to deal with its manifesting simultaneously as listlessness and an insistent maddening /anger/

I feel like it’s a physical sensation in my chest and it just makes me want to take out all of this aggressive violent energy on something. I just want to bite and scream and scratch the shit out of someone and break something but I can’t do that because I’m not a fucking toddler and you’re not allowed to have a temper tantrum at 20. and anyway no one deserves to deal with that shit just bc my brain is having a bad time.

I just want it to go away and I want to be a better kinder person but I’m not. I’m fucking angry and violent and I have no fucking outlet for it right now and it’s just getting worse.

I’m really depressed lol

sudden bad mood out of nowhere????

ok.

sudden onset of depression got me struggling not to cry in the Applebee’s

being bored and depressed on holidays sucks bc you can’t even text anyone w/o feeling like you’re ruining their holiday

sudden onset of crippling depression

*doesnt go to new years party because i have work tomorrow at 9 am*

*is kept awake by sever depression all night anyway*

when you start to feel your depression creep up on you and you know theres nothing you can do to stop it and you just have to sit there while you physically feel it getting closer and closer and making you feel fucking terrible and unable to accomplish basic tasks

haha

ha ha ha